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2024: CHAINS…ROPES…OH MY!

As we venture in our journey of life, there are somethings that happen that are meant to set us free, while others are there to anchor us to the world we live in.

Like a ship that is docked, it has ropes that keep it tied to the pier. That way it does not drift away in the night. When the ship is ready to set sail the lines are cast off and soon, it is on a path to places over the horizon on a course set by the ship’s captain.

The anchor is attached to a chain and when the ship is ready to temporarily stop, it drops anchor. When it is time to move on, hoist the anchor, and soon back on course to places over the horizon.
Do you see a pattern there? If not, that’s ok. I am going to explain it anyway.

Ships are built to head to the high seas. Ships are built to withstand rough seas. Ships are built to not only move from point A to point B but are also built to stay afloat, to stay above water.
As a Self-Leader you are also built to keep moving. You are NOT built to stay docked at any port for too long. You are also not built to stay anchored anywhere for too long. What does that mean?
It means that you are built to continue to grow, to develop, to become better than you are now.

While all this might sound like something I have said over and over before, it is because I have said it over and over. I believe in what I say. I stand by what I say. I have this passion for people to step up and be the leaders they know they can be and are. I stick to my passion because the message I share is that important.

Over the decades I have been on this planet, I have witnessed good and bad. Good things, Bad Things. Good People and Bad People. Though it would be easy to say that I have seen just about all there is to see when it comes to Good and Bad. I promise you I have only seen the tip of the iceberg. Of what I have witnessed, rest assured it still surprises me to the levels of Good and Bad people can and do go to.

That’s ok, I know that as a human being I am capable of going to those extremes. I opt out of that. No one is, no matter how much they try to kid themselves, no one is perfect. I am not perfect.
Sure, people can claim they live a pious life but are they really? A pious person would never verbally proclaim their piety for a truly pious person lets their actions and behaviors do all the talking for them.

On the other hand, there are individuals that revel in their unabashed devious behavior. The boasting and bragging of their deceit are certainly not something to be proud of or to be used as a tool to make others fear them. The pious and the deceitful have one thing in common.

They have their chains and ropes tying them down. Tying them down to live the braggadocios life they have chosen to use as a facade to mask their inability to cast off their lines and hoist their anchor to live a life they can freely choose to live. While some may argue that the pious or the deceitful are living the life they choose but at what cost? This argument can quickly become a circular argument thus, I offer this advice or words of warning:

As we venture in our journey of life, while there is no set time to cast off the ropes and hoist your anchor. You will know when the time comes. Only you will know when the time comes to set yourself free, especially when there are others trying to anchor you down or keep you tied to the dock in the name of keeping you safe. The world is not a safe harbor. The world we live in has rough seas as well as smooth swells all of which you are more than capable of handling.
Get to work!

Thank you,
David Guerra, MA, MBA

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2024: TAKE CHARGE! TAKE ACTION!

This week, I want to talk about taking charge and leading yourself.
Yep, a topic that is near and dear to my heart. You could call it my passion and that topic is SELF-LEADERSHIP.

For so long I did not know I was NOT actually in control of my life.
I was a people pleaser. I was the “nice guy.” The “don’t rock the boat” person. The Never Say No person. They knew where they stood with me. To people close to me and distant, I was just a shiny beacon for those that want to take advantage of someone, there I was.

For most of my life, I felt that was not in control of my life. Others were taking me in the direction they wanted me to go. Some had good intentions while others were just there to string me along for their sadistic pleasure.

Then over time, I started to realize that my priorities were wrong. I was willfully handing over power to those to use it or abuse it and use and abuse me, as well.

Then came a day when the breaking point was reached.

I had had enough of the lies, the manipulation and most importantly being blamed for their shortfalls and their inadequacies. I found myself in a place that something had to give, something had to happen.

It was time for me to TAKE ACTION.

It was then and there that I had to take a long hard look at myself and see where I was and where I wanted to be.

I re-assessed my place in life. Then I made the changes I felt I had to make to keep my marriage intact, free from third party influences, keeping myself present in the lives of my children. Just like that I had to do what I had to do to keep myself where I had to be as well as on the path to where I was going.

It has been a very rough road and as I am still on it, it continues to be rough. However, when it comes to being the leader of your world, a leader of your own life there will be times you have to do what must be done. That is non-negotiable.

What is also non-negotiable, is that you will be tested. Tested every day.

You will be tested by people that are looking out for your own interest.
You will be tested by people that are not looking out for you, at all.
Of course, there will be some that will not be test you but attempts will be made by individuals that believe you deserve nothing and they deserve everything you can give them. No questions asked.

These tests can be huge challenges when you find yourself worrying more about them than you worry about yourself.

However, these tests are nothing and should mean nothing to you as the only test you should take in life is you doing what you can to be better today than you were yesterday.

See, at the end of the day, there is a certainty that no one can ever change: you are responsible for yourself.

Many will fight you but at some point, in life, things must change, you must change. Remember change is part of growth.

A harsh reality is that at some point in our lives our parents will NEVER stop being our parents but they will stop parenting us and let us live our lives based on what they were able to do and NOT do in raising us, yet all the while they are hoping for the best for us.

People you once called friends may at one point or another stop being friends only to become someone you used to know.

And some people will attempt to gravitate back in your life but for what reason or why?

If they used you as a scapegoat in the past, are they looking to do that again? If that is the case, well they have not changed but you have changed. Remember that.

You are not that person anymore.
You are the leader of your life and your responsibilities.

It is not up to them anymore. It is all on YOU!

Your Future Awaits!

Thank you for your time,
David Guerra

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Accountability blog Change Decisionmaking Ethics Inspiration Leadership Motivation positive

2024: Take All The Steps Forward

Welcome.
All my life it has been my privileged honor to be witness some wonderful things, places, events, and people.
At the same time, I have witnessed some of the most inhumane things that man can do to another man, either in the name of the family, pride, ego, religion, greed, or gluttony or any combination thereof.
All the while both, the good and the bad, have inspired me to keep moving forward.
Now, moving forward means that you will continue to encounter things that will challenge you, that will motivate you, and of course, things that will make you stop dead in your tracks.
However, none of that should cause or prevent you from moving forward. From taking that next step and the next step after that and so on.
Remember, it is the journey and not the destination is the true adventure.
No matter the destination, the journey begins with the first step. However, the real journey takes place when you take that second, third, fourth and every step afterward moving forward.
Over my lifetime I have seen so many individuals be celebrated for the journey they are about to undertake. They make the plans, take that first step, then nothing.
Nothing because they failed to consider the next step and all the other steps ahead of them.
The first time I saw this was back in High School when a “football player” receive a FULL ride scholarship to Notre Dame university. Big fanfare, a huge accolade for what today would be a slightly above average high school football player. So, this guy leaves and the next thing I know he is an office manager at his father’s real estate agency. See he could not hack it, both academically and athletically.
He may have been a big fish in the small pond that was high school, so naturally college was going to be a cake-walk or so he thought. Like so many others that have had reality slap them in the face, he was wrong and properly awaken to the real world.
Once on campus, yes, he did make it to the Notre Dame campus, but he quickly found himself as a tiny guppy in a huge pond full of piranhas. He was no longer big man on campus.
Now he was just like everyone else. Just like everyone else.
This is where being the big man on campus becomes a huge disservice to anyone who always had it handed to them and never held accountable for their actions or inactions and in turn this guy never thought he had to ask for help. Because as I mentioned he had everything handed to him, everything except for a huge dose of reality.
So, what did the hometown hero do? What else could he do but to come back home with his tail tucked between his legs and all while he never admitting defeat.
By not being prepared to face the real world this high school character never stood a chance.
Never stood a chance at taking the steps forward he needed to succeed in college and college sports.
By not admitting failure this individual would rather go hide under a rock instead of taking the failure as lesson learned and using that L as a stepping stone towards success in something else.
Now that is as far as it got with the Big Man on Campus Mr. Football Star because high school was over. Like so many of my classmates we had other more important things to do than to wonder what the BMOC was up to. I joined the Army and the rest is history.
I made new lifelong friends, started a family, and had a couple of kids all the while knowing that to make a success out of yourself, you have no choice but to know and accept that the only way to get to where you want to be in life is to take ALL the steps you need to take to succeed.
Friends, ignore the fanfare and just put in the work. Start taking all the necessary steps needed because as I have stated before: YOUR SUCCESS AWAITS!

There it is because I said this!
David Guerra