Category: Change

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2024: FACING FEAR & CHOOSING COURAGE

This week, I am talking about facing fears and choosing courage.

Recently, my nephew made the jump from amateur to professional MMA Fighter. He had been training for several years and it was time. He knew it was time.

It was the inevitable path to take if he wanted to achieve his goals as a Mixed Martial Arts fighter, a professional Mixed Martial Arts fighter.

However, making the jump from amateur to professional means stepping into a professionally sanctioned match, a professional MMA cage, fighting against another professional fighter. Most certainly his amateur days were over.

He knew going in, he was going to be taking that first professional punch. He also knew he had to take that professional punch to the face. He gave punches and kicks as well as he took punches and kicks. And after 3 rounds he did not get the W.

That’s OK, because in all actuality he did win.

See, in the grand scheme of his MMA career he scored a HUGE W. While his fight record shows he is 0 and 1. His EXPERIENCE record shows him and 1 and 0.

As soon as the fight was over and the referee did not raise his arm in victory, I immediately saw in my nephew’s eyes he was already moving on to the next match. As there was nothing he could do to change the outcome of the match that just concluded.

Now before I go any further, you may be wondering what does this have to do with facing fear?

Folks, it is simple. Who in their right mind willfully steps into a Professional MMA fight knowing they are going to get punched in the face? Who in their right mind goes rushing into a burning building to save lives and put out a fire. Who in their right mind volunteers to join the Military to purposefully to go to the frontlines while everyone else is sitting in the rear with the gear.

Someone who has a LOT of fear but does it anyone because it has to be done. That’s who!

Someone who on any other regular day would be at home with their feet up on the coffee table drinking a cold one and watching the ball game but instead makes a conscious effort to face their fears and chooses courage.

Those are the individuals that have a firm grasp on where they are, where they are going and of course, success is just within reach.

Courage is a HUGE factor in achieving success. However, courage alone is not going to get you or anyone there.

Having the courage and then taking action will get you there. Sure, there are people that claim they face fear and are courageous but truthfully, they are ALL TALK and that is all they got.

They are ALL SHOW AND NO GO!

Those are the people that talk a good game be have absolutely no idea to how to face fear. Sure, they may have done it once or twice in their past but not to the point that it inspires them to try again and again of facing their fears and choosing courage.

Sadly, for those ALL SHOW AND NO-GO KIND OF PEOPLE fear has overcome them, it has overtaken them.

When push comes to shove and doing what they know they must do, they would rather back down and let others do their dirty work for them. They would rather push others into harm’s way without getting their hands dirty.

Yet, they would be quick to take the credit for the success of others and quick to point the finger and blame others for a failure.

So be careful as a leader, and especially be careful as a follower not to fall for those kinds of managers. Those bad managers will bring morale down faster than a lead balloon.

Let us get back to my nephew’s first professional MMA fight.

As the referee did not raise his hand in victory there were a couple of things that I saw as victories, as his victories; he got that first professional punch to the face out of the way. More importantly he gets that first L out of the way.

While the other guy did get his first professional punch to the face out of the way. That other guy now carries the specter of the L on his shoulder. Going forward everyone will be expecting a W including him but that first Loss is weighing heavy as it is only a matter of time.

My nephew walks into the next match without having to carry the idea of he might lose. He already has. He has tasted the L and now the first W will taste even sweeter.

My nephew knew it was not going to be easy going Pro. However, he also knows and lives on the idea and the mindset of that to get to where he wants to be, in his life he must step into something he knew was going to physically hurt him.

My nephew and countless others like him with that same mindset, are a great example of overcoming your fears by choosing courage. So starting facing your fears and choose courage.

Everyone, Your Future Awaits!

  • David Guerra, MA, MBA
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Accountability Change Ethics Inspiration Leadership Leadership Principles Mentor Morale Morality Motivation positive

2024: TAKE CHARGE! TAKE ACTION!

This week, I want to talk about taking charge and leading yourself.
Yep, a topic that is near and dear to my heart. You could call it my passion and that topic is SELF-LEADERSHIP.

For so long I did not know I was NOT actually in control of my life.
I was a people pleaser. I was the “nice guy.” The “don’t rock the boat” person. The Never Say No person. They knew where they stood with me. To people close to me and distant, I was just a shiny beacon for those that want to take advantage of someone, there I was.

For most of my life, I felt that was not in control of my life. Others were taking me in the direction they wanted me to go. Some had good intentions while others were just there to string me along for their sadistic pleasure.

Then over time, I started to realize that my priorities were wrong. I was willfully handing over power to those to use it or abuse it and use and abuse me, as well.

Then came a day when the breaking point was reached.

I had had enough of the lies, the manipulation and most importantly being blamed for their shortfalls and their inadequacies. I found myself in a place that something had to give, something had to happen.

It was time for me to TAKE ACTION.

It was then and there that I had to take a long hard look at myself and see where I was and where I wanted to be.

I re-assessed my place in life. Then I made the changes I felt I had to make to keep my marriage intact, free from third party influences, keeping myself present in the lives of my children. Just like that I had to do what I had to do to keep myself where I had to be as well as on the path to where I was going.

It has been a very rough road and as I am still on it, it continues to be rough. However, when it comes to being the leader of your world, a leader of your own life there will be times you have to do what must be done. That is non-negotiable.

What is also non-negotiable, is that you will be tested. Tested every day.

You will be tested by people that are looking out for your own interest.
You will be tested by people that are not looking out for you, at all.
Of course, there will be some that will not be test you but attempts will be made by individuals that believe you deserve nothing and they deserve everything you can give them. No questions asked.

These tests can be huge challenges when you find yourself worrying more about them than you worry about yourself.

However, these tests are nothing and should mean nothing to you as the only test you should take in life is you doing what you can to be better today than you were yesterday.

See, at the end of the day, there is a certainty that no one can ever change: you are responsible for yourself.

Many will fight you but at some point, in life, things must change, you must change. Remember change is part of growth.

A harsh reality is that at some point in our lives our parents will NEVER stop being our parents but they will stop parenting us and let us live our lives based on what they were able to do and NOT do in raising us, yet all the while they are hoping for the best for us.

People you once called friends may at one point or another stop being friends only to become someone you used to know.

And some people will attempt to gravitate back in your life but for what reason or why?

If they used you as a scapegoat in the past, are they looking to do that again? If that is the case, well they have not changed but you have changed. Remember that.

You are not that person anymore.
You are the leader of your life and your responsibilities.

It is not up to them anymore. It is all on YOU!

Your Future Awaits!

Thank you for your time,
David Guerra

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Accountability blog Change Decisionmaking Ethics Inspiration Leadership Motivation positive

2024: Take All The Steps Forward

Welcome.
All my life it has been my privileged honor to be witness some wonderful things, places, events, and people.
At the same time, I have witnessed some of the most inhumane things that man can do to another man, either in the name of the family, pride, ego, religion, greed, or gluttony or any combination thereof.
All the while both, the good and the bad, have inspired me to keep moving forward.
Now, moving forward means that you will continue to encounter things that will challenge you, that will motivate you, and of course, things that will make you stop dead in your tracks.
However, none of that should cause or prevent you from moving forward. From taking that next step and the next step after that and so on.
Remember, it is the journey and not the destination is the true adventure.
No matter the destination, the journey begins with the first step. However, the real journey takes place when you take that second, third, fourth and every step afterward moving forward.
Over my lifetime I have seen so many individuals be celebrated for the journey they are about to undertake. They make the plans, take that first step, then nothing.
Nothing because they failed to consider the next step and all the other steps ahead of them.
The first time I saw this was back in High School when a “football player” receive a FULL ride scholarship to Notre Dame university. Big fanfare, a huge accolade for what today would be a slightly above average high school football player. So, this guy leaves and the next thing I know he is an office manager at his father’s real estate agency. See he could not hack it, both academically and athletically.
He may have been a big fish in the small pond that was high school, so naturally college was going to be a cake-walk or so he thought. Like so many others that have had reality slap them in the face, he was wrong and properly awaken to the real world.
Once on campus, yes, he did make it to the Notre Dame campus, but he quickly found himself as a tiny guppy in a huge pond full of piranhas. He was no longer big man on campus.
Now he was just like everyone else. Just like everyone else.
This is where being the big man on campus becomes a huge disservice to anyone who always had it handed to them and never held accountable for their actions or inactions and in turn this guy never thought he had to ask for help. Because as I mentioned he had everything handed to him, everything except for a huge dose of reality.
So, what did the hometown hero do? What else could he do but to come back home with his tail tucked between his legs and all while he never admitting defeat.
By not being prepared to face the real world this high school character never stood a chance.
Never stood a chance at taking the steps forward he needed to succeed in college and college sports.
By not admitting failure this individual would rather go hide under a rock instead of taking the failure as lesson learned and using that L as a stepping stone towards success in something else.
Now that is as far as it got with the Big Man on Campus Mr. Football Star because high school was over. Like so many of my classmates we had other more important things to do than to wonder what the BMOC was up to. I joined the Army and the rest is history.
I made new lifelong friends, started a family, and had a couple of kids all the while knowing that to make a success out of yourself, you have no choice but to know and accept that the only way to get to where you want to be in life is to take ALL the steps you need to take to succeed.
Friends, ignore the fanfare and just put in the work. Start taking all the necessary steps needed because as I have stated before: YOUR SUCCESS AWAITS!

There it is because I said this!
David Guerra