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Leadership

2024: A Reflection on CONTROL (part 1)

Hello, again.

It has been a while since my last blog post. I had to take a little down time as the holidays started to ramp up just to get my “headspace and timing” aligned, in line, make myself ready to see the end of the year arrive, and to execute on the start of the new year.

Can you believe 2025 is now just days away? Before it comes to an end I want to take this blog post and a couple more to reflect on some of my observations, actions, reactions, and behaviors that affected my life in 2024.

So let’s begin, shall we?

The first reflection as the title says is about CONTROL.

Personal Control that borders on Intimidating Control/Abusive Behavior.

Early in 2024, I experienced someone was exerting on the individuals they are “supposed” to be leading/managing. They would be quick to snap at people, the individual would instigate confrontations in order to find themselves on top. To re-assure themselves they had control over others.

I get it. People are different. People react to the actions of others in a different way for any number of reasons.

Well, come to find out this individual was losing a close relative. This individual was watching their loved one slowly and, from what I have been able to put together, painfully reach their end of life. Then it all made sense. The behavior became crystal clear. They found themselves in a situation they could not control. There was pain and suffering and there was nothing this individual could do about it. They had no control.

It made all the sense in the world why they lashed out, why they behaved the way they did. It was completely understandable. NOT EXCUSABLE.

True, Genuine Leaders know their limits. They know when they can no longer effectively lead others. Leaders, while human beings, must also know when it is time to step aside. It is when they either do not know themselves or refuse to accept that things are out of their control that they continue to lose control and ultimately lose the respect of those they are supposed to be leading. Again, it is not excusable.

If you ever find yourself in a situation that is putting you in a place of where you feel you no longer have control and before you abusively try to control others CHECK YOURSELF and if need be, step aside. You will most certainly thank yourself.

While that is one incident, late in 2024, another individual’s lack of control and attempting to be abusive to others reared its ugly head, again. An older gentleman suddenly found himself in a health situation that all but took away his freedom. Sure he was alive, able to walk, talk, eat, and breathe. He, however, was tethered to a machine and did not know if he would ever be free of that machine. It was obvious in hearing his voice his frustration came out loud and clear. It was just a matter of time before he lashed out.

Then one day, it all came out. His sense of losing control of his life came pouring out of him. A river of obscenities, racial slurs, derogatory statements about genders, sexual preferences, and orientations. This guy was way out of line. At first, you felt a bit sorry for him and his situation, then by the end of my interactions with this person, I felt nothing but disdain, disgust, and sadness what his situation made him into and that deep down he was always that angry, hate-filled person.

In the case of the older man, while people may want to excuse his behavior and allow it to continue. LEADERS do NOT have that luxury. You will be held accountable for your actions, inaction, words, and behaviors. There are other people involved in the life you have chosen and if you cannot lead them, STEP ASIDE.

If nothing else, you can CONTROL that aspect of your life. Yes, it is that simple.

Thank you,
David Guerra

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Accountability blog Inspiration Leadership

2024: Celebrate The Small Victories

A war is one through a long, sustained, series of battles. It is winning all the battles that hastens winning a war. These battles, big or small, will always pale in comparison to the war. Nonetheless, the battles must be fought and won. There is no changing that fact.

Of course, there are different perceptions when it comes to battles, conflicts, and wars. However, there is no escaping the fact that battles, conflicts, and/or wars must be fought. There will always be some conflict. There will always be some level of discord. There is no escaping the YIN and the YANG. In order to have harmony there has to be dissonance. Without dissonance how will anyone know what harmony is? It is inevitable and no amount burying your head in the sand will deny that fact.

This fact is important to remember, that while we may not win them all, the next battle is just ahead. This is not a pessimistic way of thinking. This is a realistic way of living. Our days are full of challenges with good and bad outcomes. However, we cannot let the bad over take us and just as we should never be complacent when it comes to the good. For those that feel they are too good to fail, then let me be the first to burst your bubble, YOU will lose. You will lose more times than you will win. How do I know this? I know this because I know I have failed more than I have won.

Failing makes me appreciate the climb and the small victories. While I may never win the war, I know that I have more failures ahead of me. I also know that I have more victories, as well. But in the end, there is no coming back from the ultimate and final loss. So keep kidding yourself but when the end comes, no one will care how much you won and most certainly no one will care how much you lost. It is over and there is no winning from that loss. See, in the end we all lose.

That is why celebrating the small victories, NOW, is just as important as celebrating winning the war. Make that trip memorable by having an adventure along the way. Do not see the trip as a means to an end (the destination) but see it as part of the entire journey (there and back). The same applies with experiences, competitions, and the like. Win or Lose; Rejoice in the fact that you are alive to experience the experience. Remember, while it may be an inconvenience, a flat tire is the moment to change priorities, you pivot and make the best of an unpredicted/unprecedented situation. You turn that detour into another adventure.

Then the celebration that follows will be even better. Of course, the small victories are just an excuse to celebrate. Winning the battle is just an excuse to celebrate. Waking up and putting your feet on the ground is just an excuse to celebrate. Here is a little-known fact: small losses are an excuse to celebrate. Losing a battle, losing a war are also just excuses to celebrate.

What I am saying, is GO AHEAD and CELEBRATE!

Thank you,
David Guerra

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Categories
Accountability blog Choice Decisionmaking Leadership

2024: Adopting a ‘Can-Do’ Attitude

It is all about your attitude. It is all about your CONSISTENT attitude! It is NOT about being occasional. It is not about being a part-tine DOER! It is ALL about having a CAN-DO attitude. 

What is a CAN-DO attitude?
A CAN-DO attitude is just as it sounds. It means you have adopted an attitude (and the beginning of a lifestyle) that you will do what it takes to get what you know you can do and get done. The attitude is the mindset you have, that you believe what needs to be done can and will be done, by you.

Who can have a CAN-DO attitude?
EVERYONE! However, it all BEGINS with YOU. Someone has to lead the way, so why not you? Someone has to be the one to say, “enough is enough!” Someone has to be the one to do something in any situation when others refuse to step up.
One thing to know: The CAN-DO attitude is contagious. By being someone with a CAN-DO attitude know that others will see you, see your success, and want to achieve the same level of success. However, know that having a CAN-DO attitude is NOT a FLEX, it is something that others will want. The CAN-DO attitude is something that everyone can have, all they need is knowing that it is allowed and encouraged. By watching you exhibit a CAN-DO attitude, others will step up and join you.

Why is it important to have a CAN-DO Attitude?
The importance of having a CAN-DO attitude cannot be stressed enough. You, as an individual, know things must get done. You know that in almost all cases things are not going to get done by themselves. Additionally, you know that others lack the initiative to get those things done, especially those that must be done. This is where you, not for the sake of others, step up to get that done. You know you can do it, then do it. You know that where others fail, you succeed. So, succeed. You will come to find that the successful feeling that comes from completing something becomes like an addiction especially when you create more success.

Why is being CONSISTENT important when it comes to having a CAN-DO attitude?
Having a CAN-DO attitude means you hold yourself accountable, all the time. Seriously, what is the point of holding yourself accountable part of the time? Holding yourself accountable all the time minimizes any guess work when it comes to pushing yourself to achieve your goals and/or completing your mission. Consistency breeds reliability. 

As a current or future leader, the number one thing that those that will follow you look for and that is your level of reliability. How reliable are you to be present? How reliable are you to deliver the bad news as well as the good news? The only way to be known as a reliable leader is to be someone that is constantly consistent in what they do, say, and expect.

How long does it take to make CONSISTENCY a habit?
Short answer: as long as it takes. Long answer: As long as it takes for you to not to have to consciously think about or remember to have a CAN-DO attitude. Some say 21 days of consistency creates a habit. I say it depends on the individual some may be less others may be longer.

Let’s wrap this up.
As a leader, current or future, it serves you and those you lead to adopt a CAN-DO attitude. Having the mindset to do what must be done, when it needs to be done gives you and your team a one up on those individuals and/or groups that are not yet where they need to be to be successful. Be the example for those that are getting there and not yet inspired to begin their journey to have a full-time CAN-DO Attitude. Yes, as a leader that is your responsibility. 

Thank you,
David Guerra

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