Happy New Year!
Here we are, the calendar is calling us to notice a new year has arrived and it is here to stay. I am taking a few minutes today to write a small call-to-action, a micro-manifesto, a wish for everyone in 2018.
Hey, it is 2018. We made it! For the most part, we made it in one piece. Now ahead of us are choices and changes.
Choices we make are our own. While it may be easy to blame others the choices we make in response to the actions of others are strictly our own to make.
Changes are here. Changes are coming. For those living in the past, changes happened back then as well. Guess what, changes we will adore and other changes we will hate. However, how we react to those changes is our own choice.
Make the decision to have a GREAT & POSITIVE 2018. As I have put myself in the situation I am in now, YOU have put yourself in your own unique situation. Good or bad, you cannot only oblige yourself to make it better every day.
I know I cannot change the past, why bother even trying to re-write history. What is done can never be undone. However, I do know I can write what has not been written: my future. I do know that my future will be full of downs and ups but you have to be realistic and optimistic to know the downs are there to make us appreciate the ups.
Standing before all of us on this first day of the new calendar is the FUTURE. The unwritten, untainted, undisturbed future. It is a blank page. It is like newly fallen snow. So serene and full of possibilities. You must choose what you want to do with 2018, as I will choose what to do with my future. Remember, if others see you as weak or a failure or put in a place of misery you are there because you have given power to others. In 2018, reclaim your power by failing to allow the misery of others to become the definition of who you are today.
I know you are stronger than that. Sure, it is easy to blame others and it hurts to admit that you are still living in the past. Yet, the calendar keeps changing and the more things around you change why not change alongside them? Hold your head up, as I choose to do, refuse to allow the past and the symbols of the past (i.e., the results of failed relationships, refusing to recognize and have trust in what you have created) to dominate your current existence. While the past is a very comfortable place, it is not the reality of the present. The past with all its tainted warmth and comfort makes it difficult to trust the future. However, the future has been given to each and every one of us to create something better than what we had yesterday.
Do not get me wrong, as I do understand there is also pain associated with the past. Yet, reliving that pain day in and day out is not fair to yourself and those around you. Remaining entrenched in your past creates no future for you and those around you. Join those that have accepted the past for what and where it is. Join them in choosing to move forward.
The wonder and magic of the future is to be celebrated and shared. However, being around someone who is firmly anchored in the past is a recipe creating more pain, misery, distrust, anger, and ultimately hate. It also creates resentment and the roots of alienation begin because of the refusal to choose to let go of the past and accept that change is what will make us better people. Better human beings. Better family. Better friends. Better Life.
Now you ask, “Why start if others refuse to accept change and make a positive choice in life? The answer is simple; why are you worried about others? You cannot force someone to do what they do not want to do, especially if it means accepting that their version of life is one anchored in the past. A life that is moored to failed relationships, tied to bad decisions, and full of despair of not doing something about it. You can only do for yourself. Be the example, even if they do not want to pay attention, by accepting change and work at making those positive choices that will deliver the positive outcomes.
Yet, if they continue to work to bring you down understand and know that you are your own person and the only obligation you have is to yourself. Thus, if you choose to follow them down that rabbit hole, then you do so on your own. On the other side of the same coin, you are right and just in leaving those that are living in the past in the past and moving forward.
Yet you ask, “Won’t that make me an insensitive piece of human waste?” NO! Why would you want to remain miserable knowing by stepping away will bring you joy and happiness? Do not think you are wrong for walking away from the misery others refuse to leave. Sticking around is not being merciful.
What mercy is there when one human being savors in dragging others down into their pit of despair? It is not right and it is not just, yet many people do it because they simply can. Again, your time to move away from the negative and into the positive is now. All you have to do is want it. When you accept that change then do it, it is the only way to get started on writing your own future.
Change has now taken residence right in front of me, in front of you, in front of all of us and it will be here from this moment on until our last day. Accepting Change and Choice in 2018 is just for you!
Today, I will raise a glass and toast everyone (Family, Friends, New Friends, Old Friends, and those friends yet undiscovered)! I wish you nothing but positive, health, happiness and good for 2018 and all the years that follow.